Friday, May 14, 2010

WEEK IN REVIEW: What we have been preparing for

CHINA NATIONALS IS UPON US!

That is all.

www.zhongguofeipan.com


GOOGLE GROUPS POST OF THE WEEK:

Betsy, 5/14:

leering friends,

big brother and beijing bang are set to dominate china nationals this year, both on and off the field. what’s their secret? love and compassion. that and all the relentless scoring, stifling defense, and crazy partying.

WEEKLY ITEM #1: The Weekly Schedule

Mondays, Big Brother Practice, 8:00-10:00, Zhichunlu

Wednesdays, Track Workout, 7:30-8:30, Bang Fields near Gulou

Sundays, Big Brother Practice, 12-4, ISB.

there will be no practice this weekend, but big brother will be putting on a clinic at china nationals as they embarrass doc’s team. twice.
_________

WEEKLY ITEM #2: Upcoming Tournaments

May 15-16: China Nationals, Beijing
June 5-6: Shanghai
June 19-20: Chengdu Hat
July 4-10: Worlds in Prague

the scrimmage this sunday between bang and big brother was an epic battle. the game saw scores of 2-2, 7-4, 7-7, 11-12 and 13-12, with big brother narrowly pulling out the win. really, this game had no losers. bang’s zone was tight in the unpredictable wind and forced big brother out of its comfort zone. big brother showed some patience and had some beautiful zone offense points. both teams are ready to bring some championships back to beijing.

betsy saw many sexy things during the game.

jim’s callahan ftw was sexy.
kevin’s layout hammer grab in the endzone was sexy.
bill’s throws were all sexy.
bang’s nine women were sexy.
bang’s four women who played with big brother were sexy.
the wind was sexy.
joe’s policing of the sideline was sexy.
matt’s grey shirt was sexy.
caleb and joel battling deep is sexy.
baby shyu is sexy, but not in a creepy, leering way.
bang’s multiple upwind points were sexy.
ken’s language was both foul and sexy.
the spirit was sexy.

_________

now is the time in the weekly email when betsy gives her weekly shout outs and call outs. remember, you want to get shouted out, but you don't want to get called out.

a shout out to joe. your performance in mini on sunday reminds everyone of why you were once called mini-hulk.

a call out to women everywhere. why are you so few this weekend? was it all the leering last weekend?

a shout out to matt. this week, matt wins the award for being shouted out most often, without even being a member of the group site.

a call out to the chait. maybe if your butt wasn’t so big, you wouldn’t be getting jeff kicked out of parties all the time.

a rare shout to doc. the ultimate frisbee + ultimate fighting championship mashup wins.

a shout out to mad men parties. you are the greatest parties ever. please continue to hold yourselves on a regular basis. that is all.

a call out to nina. high heels plus already tall girl makes tiny guys like jim and joe feel extra insecure. on second thought, carry on.
_________

WEEKLY ITEM #3: MAILBAG

every week, betsy gets a lot of emails inviting her out on dates, complementing her on her leadership skills, asking her ultimate related questions, and wanting to know who she is. the mailbag is where she answers these questions. as always, these are real letters from real readers.

Letter #1:

Hi Betsy,

As the self-proclaimed “Godfather of China Ultimate”, I’m very excited to return for China Nationals this year. Is there anything I can help with the logistics or anything?

Can’t wait to catch up!
Jason

dear mr. cox,

after leaving beijing with your chinese biddy, many hearts were broken. baijiu chugging became a thing of the past. vomiting at beijing ultimate events plummeted to an all time low. tao became the standard for gentlemenly behavior. it’s not to late to turn that around. the future of beijing ultimate looks to old, wrinkly, relics of the past to show them how it’s done. this is your chance. step up.

betsy
xxxooo

Letter #2

Hi Betsy,

Even though i returned to Providence, I read your weekly e-mail all the time. I even go back and read old ones when i’m bored. Which is a lot. Sometimes i share them with my family and friends, or record myself reciting witty passages to use as my ringtone. What i’m trying to say is, keep up the good work. I’m so excited to be back in Beijing this summer!

Missing Beijing and Betsy,
~Chirona

dear chirona,

if memory serves, you were the one who brought us this:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2007195&id=1378740071

your return is eagerly anticipated by all.

betsy
xxxooo

_________

and finally, your moment of zen…

11th edition rules clarifications for observers re: penalties for
offsides.

VIII. Starting and Restarting Play
B. Pull:
4. Positioning before the pull:
a) After signaling readiness, players on the pulling team may move anywhere in their end zone, but their feet may not cross the vertical plane of the goal line until the disc is released.
b) After signaling readiness, players on the receiving team must be in contact with the goal line that they are defending without changing location relative to one another.
c) After the disc is released, it is in play and any player may move in any direction.
d) If either team fails to maintain proper positioning before the pull, the other team may audibly announce “off-sides” and a re-pull ensues. The call must be made before any player on the receiving team touches the disc.
e) In games where Observers are used, the Observers may monitor and call offsides as appropriate. The first instance of offsides for each team will result in a warning and a re-pull. After a team has received its warning, any further instances of offsides are treated as follows:
(1) receiving team offsides: receiving team starts with the disc at the midpoint of the end zone they are defending, after players set up and a check is performed.
(2) pulling team offsides: receiving team starts with the disc at midfield, after players set up and a check is performed.

rules clarifications are sexy.

catch you on the field,
betsy
xxxooo

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